Evey Rose Has Its Thorn

I'm sick.. Feverish.. due to this disgusting abscess growing infectiously under my beautiful armpit. I took 2 days off from work cos I really am so weak. It's funny how things are in a way, for I don't function the way I normally do. I couldn't drop my arms down. I couldn't work my way around the computers.. I couldn't grab a hold of the mouse at work and I couldn't even lift my baby at home, dude, I couldn't even eat and sleep right. I'm taking P2K+ worth of medications and that's just for 7 freakin days. Ouch two tops.. huh? Really hurtin my pocket and my body too. Hehe..

My partner, she was really supportive though, she took a day out of work too to be with me at the ER.. She slept over and took care of me like that of a baby, w/c is quite a big deal since I'm always taking care of my Baet.. It's nice to have someone take care of you for a change.. She's really great.. In fact, I find her looking really good every time I'm with her.. As in, ang gwapo nya tlga.. Hay.. And to add up to that God-like physical appearance of her.. Let me just tell you how great she is.. for paying for an Apple iPhone 4 from a recontracting deal my mom got from rip-off Globe Telecoms. See, my mom's two year plan is up and is entitled to a free phone. We upgraded and had to pay out right for a handset w/c I now own.. okay.. okay.. let me say it again peeps.. I now own A Black Apple iPhone 4 16GB.. yey!

I know it's not that big a deal.. It's an in-season-techy stuff that's gonna get faced-out some time in the future too, pero mga chong.. iPhone 4 to noh! Wlang basagan ng trip.. hehe.. I remember how I originally requested for a white one but apparently, they're out of stock.. Good thing I went for the black, cos it's classy and far more bold than the white, dumihin pa yung white.. My besy got the white one.. so okay na.. at least I get to experience both. I have a postpaid myself and I got a free phone along with it. My Crein paid for the iPhone 4's cash out and I get to use it of course.. and in return to the correspondence, I gave her my Sony Ericsson Xperia 8 and I gave my mom my other phone w/c is a Nokia X2-01. . and voila!! Everybody happy.. except maybe.. partly.. not me.. cos I have a lump here.. huhu.. My partner and I were teasing nga and cudling a while back and I couldn't fight her back.. hay.. I wanna be well already.. Must be from all the stress I've been having.. The nanny I have isn't that much helpful, I mean sure.. she's really in for cleaning the whole lot of the house.. But when it comes to Riane.. she just doesn't have the heart.. Hmm, let's just say.. She's not who I'm looking for.. Hay.. buhay.. I can't take this stress anymore..

My partner and I talked all night. She's a good person to talk to. She has all the opinion in the world and I get to laugh at most of them. They're good though. She shared her lifetime plan with me. It was really nice, especially since Baet and I am in it. I didn't expect how I would be able to pull out a strand from my dream and make it happen in real life. She was once all I've ever wished for as a partner.. but quite frankly.. I don't think I'm ready for all of her just yet.. I mean.. True, she's perfect.. and all that they may never be.. it's just that I'm in a little bit of a mess right now.. and with all of what's happening.. I'm just about ready to fall apart.. My Darling Riane's the only thing that's holding it all up for me..

I've been pushing her the way I've pushed others that came before her.. but the funny thing is.. she's literally not like all the others.. She sticks around.. no matter how hard I do.. Sometimes, I just get really tired of it.. hehe.. hence quiting pushing away..

Someone told me.. If I push people away all the time like I always do.. then I might end up alone.. hmm.. guess what.. I don't think I care that much about that aspect.. It doesn't really matter that much to me.. hehe.. I have my reason for being and without my Riane.. Seriously? I'd be dead.. and I mean literally.. dead..

Crein's the relationship type of dream. The reason for the sly smile on your face everymorning. The one type whom you bring home to mom and tatay even if it's kinda imoral.. haha!! The reason why you love little holidays suh as Valentines, Anniversaries, Monthsaries and even Forthnightsaries.. haha! The reason why you love weddings and engagement rings.. The reason why you have so many reasons and just couldn't grab one cos they're all rushing through your brains.. The reason why they say "She's all that..!" Actually.. I can be all that too.. hmm.. anyway.. haha!

Seriously.. I couldn't bare to hurt her.. She deserves so much more.. We all do..

To be continued..