Calling Cupid!!

Most of my blog posts from 2008 are a little bit heart-wrecking. I kind of feel sorry for my old self as I browse through them. So much love to give right there.. and now, it makes me wonder whether I still have more to give. Do I? Have I been trying?

In this lifetime, I recall a lot of cool moments when time surely was passing me by real fast. Pseudo as they call it.. Something that seems to be there and real, and yet, you just couldn't grab a hold of it.. can't seem to put your heart into it.. It's there, both just couldn't take it.
On 2008, during the rockiest of the rockiest of my six year relationship, within The Kimerald Love Story, this happy lang kase seem to have mutated on its own since then. There was this Summer Love Affair, Sassy Girl and just recently Humpy Dumpy Road Trips.. The might-have beens of my life.. hehe.. All left a mark..

Funny and silly, if I may say so myself, the way I have been putting up so much effort dodging Love Shots from Mr. Cupid. I couldn't let him catch me with those frightening arrows. Oh, C'mon dude, one time you hit me with one of those things.. You got my head.. Everything was messed up right there, since then, I've been confusing dreams and reality.. love and hate.. risk and fear.. trust and respect.. tsk.. Been fixing up your mess for a little while now, and I'm doing a very good job at it, no thanks to you.. I think you might be losing your touch little mister match maker. True love, kind of doesn't exist anymore?!? What?? You busy with something else? Yeah, you heard me, Love Bug. I'm talking to you! So the next time you feel like going to work, use your glasses or whatever should help you take a great aim of where that stupid arrow should really go to.. You know where it is right? Yeah, it's right here.. where it beats.. the heart wise guy. So please.. show people that that romantic love thing of yours still works. Fix your crappy arrows and make em work!!

See, here I go again. Something really great is happening to me for some time now.. And I'm afraid I may have to dodge this one too. I have been trying to control my emotions from showing up.. For quite frankly, I don't know if I want it. Oh, crap.. What am I saying?? This is so heavy. This is so confusing. I don’t know what I am actually trying to avoid. I mean, I’m so scared of these things that I’m feeling. Cos every time I get all these rush of electricity within my veins. It always leads to unconditional happiness.. like yesterday.. and the day before that.. and the day before.. yes.. I was getting all that jitterbugs.. all because of this seemingly perfect being.. so contagious too. Being with this person knocks me off my feet. After being together.. I keep smiling all the time.. And I don’t know why.. And I don’t know where I’m going.. And I walk around the house smiling stupidly.. And I don’t seem to understand why I’m holding a screw driver and a soap.. And I tell everybody about this weirdness that kinda feels so good.. And everybody is happy for me.. Gosh.. It’s crazy.. I never actually met anyone from my fantasy.. and yet.. here's one.. who wants to kiss me..