Rated PG

I feel like writing today. I have a lot in mind I want to talk about. But then, what am I doing.. my mouth goes.. blah.. blah.. blah.. but my mind says something else.. hmm..

I went home early today. My everyday itinerary shows otherwise. See, what happens is I get so accustomed to a particular habit and whenever I get very comfortable, I find it hard to change them.. I'm not saying it's impossible.. i did said it's hard.. Everyday I set my clock to 19:00 hours.. the tone of the alarm is from Beyonce's - Single Ladies.. I have gotten immune to the sound though.. so I miss the alarm everyday.. I wake up to the beat of my very carefree heart.. rushing my fat b*tt down the stairs.. dragging my still sleepy head into the bathroom and a lot hesitant to pour the water on my still warm body.. (yahks.. ang ginaw eh).. I then quickly grab anything I could find from the closet and throw on the bed those that I couldn't find comfortable to wear. If there's still 30 minutes on the clock, I two blocks from home to take the jeepney for work.. If there's 20 minutes, I could still find time to pick a nice taxi cab down the block and be able to blow dry my hair in the office.. If there's 15 minutes, I run like the wind and grab the nearest cab.. bring my toothbrush and comb my hair in the cab.. If there's 10 minutes left.. I'm in deep trouble.. Nine hours of work.. less the lates.. less the lunch and breaks.. less the over breaks.. less the avail times.. hay.. how could I do this to my work.. Why was I made this way? Yah.. blame it all on others.. hehe.. Sorry.. Joke lang po.. I know I could change.. I just need to be very.. hmm.. very.. dedicated? hmm.. I know I am.. I try to please people I talk to.. (no fair huh.. that's not even difficult for me).. hmm.. I guess.. I have to push myself further.. Be punctual.. whoever invented such word.. must be enjoying himself seeing me struggle.. troubled with the thought of how I could comply with it.. haha.. I know it's important.. I just have to find ways I could enjoy being early.. as the bird.. whoever said birds aren't late?? hooh! headache!

I was supposed to be watching the original Planet of the Apes, 1968 version. I was really looking forward to rekindling the very first times I remembered I was a flick addict.. haay.. good old days.. good old lazy days.. I miss procrastinating.. I miss hanging out with my good friends doing nothing but think about "hmm.. anu kayang magandang gawin.." haay.. those good old days.. nothing compares to those idle moments.. times when you couldn't give a d*mn about what others are doing.. or thinking.. when people don't talk about you.. cos nobody's around to blab about your whereabouts.. cos everyone is too busy to mind you.. only the parents nags.. and it doesn't matter.. cos they're gonna do it again tomorrow and your ears memorized everything it heard.. you could just compose a song about how they consistently nag you.. the good thing is.. they don't hurt.. as much as gossips.. Anyway.. I really couldn't care. I've had worse than gossips.. These little things couldn't kill me.. I started giving everyone the benefit of the doubt a long time ago anyway.. There are people that I just don't stand a chance with.. Those who are the pretenders.. the ones who trick people.. Those I couldn't really figure out.. to h*ll with them..

Happy place..

Happy thoughts..

Okay...........................

Earlier, I was feeling a bit sick. I didn't feel like going to work. I was a bit floating and a bit troubled about what I have been doing to myself lately. An alter-ego was playing its part with my rarely appreciated self. See.. I've recently had a very exciting getaway lately.. My friend and I went to Puerto Galera the last weekend. I've spent my weekend expanding my knowledge and opening up to a whole new world of escapades. Hmmm.. CJ, is a friend from work.. She's like my best gal friend in the office. Twas fun having her around while I was really drunk and sleepy.. hehe.. I've spent the day with a very special person.. One whom I felt really comfortable with.. someone who's behind me lately.. Someone whom if I couldn't even see.. I thought.. would still be there..

"..would it be wrong to look in the eyes, see them stare.. see right through them.. the little grin.. they rocked my world.. turned me around.."

..sounding a bit sexual am I not? hehe.. totally not sounding.. let's just say.. I'm a new soul.. a bit hardcore and wild on the outside at times.. but still soft in the inside.. sometimes I wonder.. should everything be superficial.. there's more to life than what meets the eye.. but if the eyes makes one feel for the heart.. then.. could the eyes make life beat as how one sees everything.. another shallow thought from someone confused about what the world is throwing at her.

I really couldn't figure out myself right now.. could anyone help me clear things.. I'm so not aware of where I currently am. To sum it all up.. I guess.. everything is reciprocated in a way.. the heart plays it's part.. the eyes does too.. It's all a matter of how the mind balances everything..

Could it be.. hmm.. I wonder..

Gonna rest my eyes a bit.. Let the body talk.. We'll figure this out..